Writing in the Face of Violence and Bloodshed.
my thoughts on art, despair, & perseverance - welcome back to The Slush Pile.
As The Slush Pile reaches its Issue 26, I write to you all with a heavy heart under even heavier circumstances. I write to you in the face of Palestinian genocide and atrocities in Sudan, the Congo, and elsewhere. I write to you in the face of violence and bloodshed and horror that just can’t and shouldn’t be ignored but that many people are choosing to support or find excuses for. In my day-to-day life, it’s hard for me to concentrate on other things, to not fall into black holes of horrifying photos and videos online, to do anything and not think about what’s happening in other parts of the world, to not burn with anger and fight for freedom of oppressed people.
When I turn on the faucet, drink water, pour the last drops into my potted plant or dog’s bowl, I think about what Palestinian person could’ve drank that water. When I’m so full I can’t finish my food, I think about the millions of Palestinians who are starving right now because Israel destroyed all their bakeries. When I go to bed at night, I think of nothing but every Palestinian person who no longer has a home because Israel first stole their ancestral land, then bombed it to the ground. I am full of hurt. I am full of rage and I know now that those images of violence will never leave me. Which, if we’re honest, if we’re humans with compassion and heart and empathy, is exactly how it should be. It reminds me that I’m not desensitized and those in power have no hold on me or how I see the breaking apart of the world.
The thing is, I can’t help but wake up to the reality that I’m always writing in the face and bloodshed. No matter what, we’re always creating art, always living, at the same time that atrocities are occurring in other parts of the country and the world. When I live comfortably, someone else suffers. Unfortunately, speaking from an American perspective, it’s so easy for most people to turn off the phone, shut off the TV, and ignore what’s happening. We reason that it doesn’t concern us, doesn’t affect us, we say “how sad” and go on with our day with the horrors pushed down to the back of our minds or erased altogether. I’ll admit, I used to think of it as a survival tactic. After all, injustice is as much a constant as joy is. If we were to take on all the burdens of the world all the time, we’d destabilize ourselves and never get anything done.
But that rings hollow now. The thought that people are able to ignore Palestine, write off genocide as “just what happens in a third world country” sickens me to my stomach. So what, you might ask, makes this time so different?
I don’t know what other people’s feeds are looking like but across all platforms for me, it’s impossible to look away from what’s happening (which, again, is a good thing). Everyday, I scroll through countless videos and photos, most of which I see shared on people’s stories on IG or retweeted on Twitter. Whether it’s spotlighting the suffering being experienced on the ground in Gaza, offering education or resources or recommendations, rebuking politicians, or sharing repostable images and tweets, it all serves to raise awareness and make the atrocities undeniable. After all, we live in the age of social media and nothing is more damning than digital evidence. It’s teaching us, calling us to action, holding us accountable if we scroll past without action or emotion.
The other part of this is that the U.S. empire is quite literally playing a direct role in causing this genocide against Palestinians (just yesterday, it was announced that Biden is being sued for enabling Israel, providing weapons, diplomatic support, and billions in annual military aid). For many Americans, this is the first time many of us are acutely aware of our role in a war crime. Our tax dollars are funding genocide. Our tax dollars are currently dropping missiles and bombs on innocent civilians, wiping out entire family bloodlines, as well as hospitals and evacuation routes. Our tax dollars are depriving men, women, and children of food, water, fuel, electricity, and medical care. Not only that, but our tax dollars fund Israel’s universal health care system, free education system, and free abortions at the cost of our own population. We are literally funding someone else’s basic human rights while our own politicians deny us the same asks for the sake of a vote.
Indirectly and directly, we are responsible for the violence and bloodshed that is happening and that we are witnessing today. We are at fault and therefore, should be held accountable to educate ourselves, take action, demand an end to the relentless bombardment and Israeli occupation, and fight for a free Palestine. There is no other option. There is no other choice. This isn’t as complicated as U.S. propaganda would have you believe. We owe it to the 11,000+ Palestinians who have been killed by Israel in the last 38 days alone, the Palestinians left fighting, and all the Palestinians who will come after.
As someone who is Mexican American, I’m also viewing this issue through a Latin American lens, a perspective from a region that has also been subject to Israel-backed abuse and military violence for decades. In virtually almost every LATAM country including Chile, El Salvador, and Venezuela, Israel Defense Forces have supplied arms, training, surveillance tech, and aid to militaries that have then carried out genocide against indigenous populations, activists, and children. Palestine is not and has never been a singular, disconnected, standalone issue. Our struggles for liberation don’t exist in a vacuum but are in a fact a collective fight for liberation. As a result, my heritage ties me tight to this issue. I have emotional stake in this and given the global reach of the IDF, I have little doubt that anyone of any heritage does as well. We are well within our rights to demand freedom for all.
It’s no wonder that I find it hard to write these days, left alone find joy. How do I write about what I’m going through, let alone post non-Palestine related content, let alone live, when so much of what I’m feeling is so intertwined with the fate of the world, the genocide of a people? But the more I think about it, perhaps that is exactly the point. There’s so much we can do, so much I’ve already done, like emailing and calling my representatives, signing petitions, resharing resources online, supporting Palestinian businesses and creators, having open conversations with loved ones.
But even more than that, there’s something to be said about leaning into what I’m feeling, using my rage to create and fuel it into something worth preserving. No matter what, I don’t want to say that I stayed silent during a genocide. I don’t want to say that I didn’t try. That I despaired. That I didn’t persevere or write a single word. It’s long since time that we use our words to say something meaningful and allow our rage to fuel us in times of violence and bloodshed. We deserve that and Palestinians too, that much more.
notes from the writer’s desk ✍️
my favorite recently pub’d pieces:
updates:
For my LA friends, I’m going to be performing at the Junior High Fundfest in Glendale this Saturday during the Poetry Hour from 3-4pm! Please consider attending to support the organization’s staff, programming, and facility rennovations. Purchase tickets here.
I’m so excited to announce the upcoming publication of my debut children’s book!! The book will spotlight past and present queer heroes from Latin America and the U.S. and is forthcoming from Jessica Kingsley Publishers. More info and details to come soon! In the meantime, please read this thread I wrote about the project.
The audiobooks for my self-published poetry chapbooks STREAMING SERVICE: golden shovels made for tv and STREAMING SERVICE: season two are OUT NOW! Experience my work on a different channel on Google Play now, with more retailers and platforms to come soon. If you still need your digital and/or signed physical copies, order from my shop site today! Thank you as always for your support :’)
resources:
Looking for book recommendations? Check out my Bookstagram and TikTok to keep up with what I’m reading and loving right now! On TikTok, you’ll also get more snippets of my everyday writing life and lifestyle/fashion content. See you there!
other stories i’m loving 📖
currently reading:
River Woman, River Demon by Jennifer Givhan
currently watching:
Ugly Betty S3
currently listening to:
“Softly” by Amber Mark
all my love,
sofía xx
Thanks for putting into words what so many of us can relate to. <3